What Stands Between YOU And The MONEY You Want?

What stands between you and your financial success? In my experience, big life changes happen when you are willing to identify these two things:

1) What do you want money to do for you? Try this: Imagine that your fairy godmother sprinkles magic dust upon you while you sleep tonight. Her magic removes all obstacles from your path and makes everything possible for you. When you wake tomorrow morning, what will you do? Where will you be? Who will be with you? How will you spend your day? How will you spend your money? Describe your ideal day — from the moment you wake up until the moment you go to sleep at night. Include your five senses — what do you see, hear, smell, taste, touch?

2) What is holding you back from having your ideal day; your ideal life. Is it money? If so, what is keeping you from having enough? This is very important to pinpoint because you can’t change what you don’t acknowledge. Following is a sampling of the things I hear from my coaching clients and readers. I’ve placed the often heard statements into a readers’ poll. I plan to address the most common obstacles in the future, so please help me by selecting as many options as ring true for you and your situation. (Note: Email and RSS feed subscribers, you’ll need to click through to this blog post to use the embedded poll.) Please add any obstacles, habits, excuses or emotions that I missed into the comments section. Feel free to elaborate about your reactions to this exercise as well. I think this could be a very interesting conversation — thanks for participating!

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Millionaire Mommy Next Door

A self-made millionaire shares her recipe for success, happiness and financial freedom.

30 thoughts on “What Stands Between YOU And The MONEY You Want?”

  1. Very interesting…none of the above is true for me! I guess I’m lucky to have a full-time job that pays me quite well for my age and the going local rates, and I take on freelance projects as they become available to me (though I’m not actively seeking them out at this point). My creative partner and I also launch a new online project every 6 months or so. Right now I’d say I’m just waiting a few years for these investments to pay off and for my savings (at least 50% of my gross income) to continue to grow – I wouldn’t want to jeopardize my f/t job by taking on too much freelance work, and I wouldn’t want to jeopardize my health or home life either. Should I be chasing more?

  2. I feel very confident about saving and being “good” with my money, but investing represents the great unknown to me and I wish I understood a heck of a lot more about it. I also identify a lot with the statement about follow-through. Many of my money making ideas have revolved around capitalizing on the various hobbies I enjoy, and I’ve found that once I am making money from them I simply don’t enjoy them anymore and my drive to make money fizzles.

  3. I feel like I’m in a catch 22. I want to work from home and spend more time with my kids, but being a single mom of 3 kids and having to work full time, I find it difficult to take what free time I do have with them and using it to finding other means of bringing in money.

  4. My husband has a good, stable job, so in that point we are very comfortable. However, we built a home on a few acres and are now “house poor.” I would be happy to sell and buy an older and/or more affordable home, but he wants to stay put. I brainstorm all the time about ways I can help pay off the mortgage (that and a car note are our only debt), but being a stay-at-home/homeschooling mom of 4 makes it difficult. We have some investments, mostly Roth IRA’s, but no savings, and little in the kids college fund. And we can’t afford to contribute. Not to mention I could use a vacation. Any quick advice?

  5. I think my biggest hurdle is learning how to make my money make money. I have a great job with great wages and am in the process of cutting down my spending to grow my savings. Since my gifts are in services (debt management and organization), its hard to know how to kick off that type of endeavor.

  6. I actually have no problems with math / debt / investing, my core issue is I can’t think of an idea to make more money. I current save about 30% of my salary and am looking to increase that percentage further, but I can’t think of more ways / ideas to increase income or businesses to start to do this.

  7. It is very tough trying to pay off debt, I keep wheeling and dealing for cheaper rates, good luck to all.

  8. Add this one: I don’t know where my passion lies, and/or how I could make money with it.

  9. My lack of financial knowledge makes me feel overwhelmed but I’m working to figure out where to start…this site is helping me a lot!

  10. How about a “choice” option? All of the above read as excuses, which may have been your goal, but what about a life choice option? Everyone has a choice of career, time management, family, living quarters, etc. And, obviously, everyone has different personal priorities. Since very few in the US actually starve, it is more a matter of one’s (or a couple’s) choice.

    I don’t make more money because a. I am not willing to give up my personal time, and b. I am not willing to sacrifice my marriage. Those are not obstacles, but paths in life that I choose, everyday, to put before money that I’d love to have. I think your life shows a great example of this: you have a time priority that, if you didn’t possess, could free you to make a lot more money.

  11. @Lauren: Choices, absolutely! As you know, my top personal priority is free time. I’d much rather have less money, more time. This post, though, was targeted towards those who want/need more money to reach their self-described dreams. I wrote, “What is holding you back from having your ideal day; your ideal life. Is it money? If so, what is keeping you from having enough?” Obviously, for some people, a shortage of money isn’t the reason they aren’t experiencing their best life, but this post is addressing the money issue.

  12. My ideal would be to spend the entire day on things that have nothing to do with making money. An hour in contemplation/meditation, 3-4 hrs in community work, 3-4 hrs reading/gardening/hobbies, and the evenings spent with family. But don’t really see how to achieve that without spending time earning until retirement..

  13. Sam Iam, have you considered meshing the two together? I mean, perhaps you could create a situation where you get paid to do things you love doing: gardening, reading (editor?), meditation (lead a group?), hobbies (sell or teach?). If you find a way to combine your loves with income, you may find you never want to retire because you’ve redefined “work”.

  14. Thanks for your reply MMND, you are quite right — there are no limits with some imagination and courage! Have been browsing through other entries on your blog – so many great ideas. I will begin small and work on clarifying exactly my dreams for the future… fun too :)

  15. I 100% agree with May. I’m becoming a better financially but i would like to know more about investing: How to invest and who to invest in. I like Nike so I wanted to invest in Nike. is that smart practice?

  16. Add: I can’t decide what to focus on. I find I have so many interests, whether they be hobbies or career aspirations that I do nothing more b/c I can’t decide what to focus on. Also add: I expect life changes soon (new baby, parent ill, etc) and I fear I won’t have the time to finish what I started.

  17. I am getting a handle on my finances and learning how to manage a part-time position as the boss that I plan to concentrate more on after retirement. The great thing about all of this is that I am learning what I need to do at this stage and gradually implementing the resources and other tools that will help to ensure that I am successful. The passion is there and the funds that I earn now lets me know that it will be worth the effort. My greatest reward is in knowing that in the process of helping myself, that I will also be in a position to help other people. That will make all of the difference to me.

  18. No excuses for me, i think I am simply a lazy procrastinator. Plain and simple, its something i am working on this year.

    Great post, thanks MMND.

  19. No of the above apply to me. I have started a business as an event planner, I believe in myself. This is more than a hobby and I continually work at making myself more knowledgable in business and other wise. I believe that I could succeed , I am just having a difficult time connecting to individuals who need and will pay for my service. Under my official business started in ’08 I have no events. Individuals want to see fresh and new, and it is that age old question , how do I get experience if you wont give me a chance. Without a job marketing and expo opportunities are difficult. Between a rock and a hard place. What category would I fall under?

  20. hi jen, where ya been? i look forward to more insightful posts. and i do hope all is well. i want to thank you for your great content. i found your blog doing a search of women bloggers and found yours to be the most engaging and thoughtful of the bunch; ive since read every post twice over and picked up the optimism book (indeed a fascinating read). i appreciate the effort you put in your writing and communication style (that writing group of yours must be a good one!) and for providing such encouraging and inspiring material. keep it up!

  21. I’m still here, Imelda, and all is great! I’ve just been so busy lately. Good stuff going on… I’ll be posting soon, soon, soon! Thanks so much for checking in with me and for your very kind feedback and compliments. I appreciate!


  22. I’m not saying I’m really good at handling my finances or lucky enough that none of the above describes what hampers me but I really think I still need to learn a lot and discipline myself. I cannot quality myself as being afraid to take risk because I’m now trying..slowly but surely..as if there’s surety in business but at least I can take it slow on my finances.

  23. A lot of obstacles in that list but I didn’t see solutions. The following are a cluster of obstacles I don’t know how to resolve:

    # I’m not qualified for a better job.
    # I’m unemployed and few companies are hiring.[certainly not hiring unskilled!]
    # I need money to (start my business / go to school…) but I can’t get a loan.

  24. I have 15 years of experience in sales and finance. I am currently a stay at home mom which I love and enjoy. My husband on the other hand wants me to work full time so he can stay at home with our 18 month old son. I would love to make money online while at home with my son. My preference is to work for myself. Any ideas or suggestions?

  25. all my money goes for bills I can tell you before I get it where ,not much left over it has gotten to me don’t feel like it will get better soon enough.The problem I see is I am in much better shape then 80% of the single mothers I come across this is not good where will they get hope, to go on. if things don’t change,who will help these moms and their children most dad don’t help pay the bills they move on.

  26. I have a great life with a loving partner and 2 daughters but, money keeps us from doing the things we desire. We are always worried about the future and not sure how will we survive it. I love cooking and would love to go into people’s home and make like a week worth of food for then but, I don’t know where to start and I think fear is holding me back. I really want a secure future and I am not going to rely on my partner for that.

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